What is Financial Infidelity and why is it dangerous?
Financial infidelity, according to our book, “Financial Lovemaking 101,” is the act of engaging in financial activities that your partner is unaware of. This can include earning money on the side and not sharing it with the family pot, spending on things that your partner would not approve of, or stashing money away in the event of a divorce. At some point, everyone looks out for themselves, this is only natural. But there is an implicit understanding in any family or relationship that important financial decisions are going to be communicated with your partner in such a way that you reiterate an equal commitment to the survival of the collective.
Financial infidelity can be as hurtful as someone cheating on you or having a baby with someone else. The pain might stem from the fact that you’ve communicated to your partner that you are not as invested in the relationship as they are. It says that you’re more interested in your own wants and needs than those of the family unit. If both of you have agreed from the beginning to only take care of yourselves, that makes sense. But if your partner has been convinced to invest everything and finds out you’re not, it can breed the same kind of distrust as adultery.
So, while you might want to believe that “what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine,” you have to remember that this is not very good for a healthy relationship. Read more from this article about secret credit card purchases to get a deeper understanding of the concept.
Those secret credit card purchases you’ve been making behind your spouse’s back may be doing a lot more damage to your marriage than you realize.
According to a new report by Moneysupermarket.com, one in ten people admit that hidden credit card purchases have played a part in their separation or divorce.
Polling 1,000 men and women, the British price comparison site also found that 36 percent of those who had lied about their spending did so because they knew their other half would be angry, while a further 35 percent said they kept their purchases hidden because they knew their partner would disapprove.
But it wasn’t all frivolous purchases the respondents were keeping under wraps. While 50 percent of the people confessed to treating themselves on things like new shoes and clothes using their credit card, the same number claimed they were using their credit card for living expenses, including utility bills, rent, food and gasoline.
Another interesting finding? While women were 60 percent more likely to hide a statement from their partner — and admitted feeling more guilt for doing so — it was the men who spent more on average.
This certainly isn’t the first time a survey or study has found a link between divorce and financial disagreements. In July 2013, researchers out of Kansas State University found that arguing about money is the top predictor of divorce. And in 2011, a study conducted by the National Endowment for Financial Education found that 68 percent of the time, financial infidelity has had a negative impact on relationships, with 16 percent of marriages ending because of it.
READ MORE via Secret Credit Card Spending And Divorce Linked In New Survey.